(A/N: Hi guys. My third fic is still not ready yet so deal. I’ve been wanting to do something like this forever. You’re probably going “Like what?” Well, misting… where you take a fanfic that someone wrote and make fun of it while people are reading it… it’s hard to explain so just read. Purple – fanfic Black – misting… my comments)

Trapped

"Ash! You moron! You got us all lost again!"

“Yeah, ya stupid idiot.”

"Me? Misty, you said this way would take us back to Viridian City!"

”Yeah but you listened to her, Ash”

"Look, smarty pants, if you would have made a right when I said to, maybe we would be there now!

“Yeah right… you’d be even more lost.”

Look where we are! We're a million miles away from Viridian City, stuck in a forest with YOU!"

"Hey! I said to follow the map, but nooo, you had to take a short cut!"

(Pretending to be Ash) “Just like you do in other things… if ya know what I mean.”

"It IS a short cut! You just made the wrong cut!"

"Chill out," Brock

“The crack head with no eyes”

said trying to calm the two down. Pikachu was following behind the group. He liked watching Ash and Misty

“Do IT”

quarrel. Togepi passed Pikachu the popcorn as they watched the fight continue. Brock slapped his head

“He he he”

and sat down waiting for them to stop.

The next morning, the two finally gave up because of thirst. Ash begged for water while Misty

“Sucked his ……”

demanded it. Brock woke up, chucked them both a thermos full of water,

“Noticed he wet himself,”

and they both chugged it down. "You know," Brock started to talk to them, "you two act like boyfriend and girlfriend."

Ash

“Beat up Brock… with a lot of help form Misty”

and Misty looked at each other. "DO NOT!" they both yelled back at the same time. Pikachu and Togepi were

“Doing IT again”

awake. They both stared at their trainers as if Ash and Misty were a comedy show shown on TV. Ash and Misty, who both were able to talk without thirst, argued again.



"Jessie,

(Pretending to be James) “I want to fuck you”

are you sure this trap will work this time?" James asked as Team Rocket was digging a hole in the ground.

"Well, has it worked every other time?"

"No..."

"So it won't work!"

“Duh it never works”

"Then why are digging a hole?"

"Because we can! Get back to work!"

After Team Rocket dug the hole, they covered it up, hid behind the bushes,

“Fucked each other,”

and waited for Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu

“Aka Big ass chu”

to go by. The hole failed and just as the group was out of

“The closet”

site, Team Rocket stood right into the middle of the path thinking why the hole didn't fall. Bad idea,

“Hmm… I wonder what will happen next… Will they realize that they dug the hole in the wrong spot?”

the floor collapsed under them and they fell in.



The group

“Of assholes”

was starving later that day. Brock left his backpack on a stump and a herd of Rattatas stole all the food. "I want pizza!" Ash yelled. "I want

(pretending to be Misty) “Ash”

chicken soup!" Misty yelled. "Pika Pi! (I want ketchup!)" Pikachu yelled. "I want Nurse Joy!" Brock yelled.

“You would”

They all looked at Brock. "I'm not gonna eat her!" Brock said folding his arms.

“You would if you could”

The group was hungry, really, really hungry. They all went forward heads down until they came into a clearing. There was a large, old house. It looked like it had multiple stories, around three not including the basement. Brock walked up to the doorstep and knocked on the door. "I'm coming!" a youngish female voice called from the inside. Brock gave a wink to the group (that is, if he could open his eyes). The door opened. There appeared a young lady with greenish hair pulled back into a ponytail. The lady was beautiful and Brock was love struck.

“Why does Brock always get love struck around girls… oh wait that’s right he’s a teenage boy”

"Hi! I'm Kellan," she greeted.

"AND I'm Brock!" Brock instantly greeted back. Kellan giggled.

"Hm, you guys look lost. I won't mind if you stay for the night... or a couple of years," she said.

(Pretending to be Kellan) “Then one of you can marry me and the others can be our slaves and wait on me hand and foot and…”

"Oh, we'll definitely stay for a couple of years!" Brock said. His face was neon pink. Misty wacks Brock behind the head with a mallet.

After the group introduced each other, and they agreed that they'd be staying, they were finally let inside. "Whoa, nice place," Ash commented. "This is really old!" Misty gave Ash a nudge.

“I have one question… Why did Misty give Ash a nudge? I mean he didn’t say anything stupid.”

"Don't worry, Misty," Kellan said, "I have to admit it is old. The floors are a bit creaky so don't put too much pressure on them or else you'll fall through." Pikachu's stomach then growled and everyone remembered they were hungry. Brock and Kellan agreed to cook for them. Togepi and Pikachu decided to check the house out. Misty left for the house's backyard to look at the stream. Ash was all alone with nobody to give him company.

“So he decided to pleasure himself while thinking about Misty”

He simply went exploring the house. The house had three stories along with a basement. The first story had the family room, dining room, and kitchen. The second story stored the bedrooms. The third was more of a storage and also home for many Pokemon. 'Nice place,' Ash thought. The floor creaked whenever he was on any of the floors. 'The ground's really weak.'



Meanwhile, Kellan and Brock were

“He he he he he he he…… Guess what I’m thinking?”

cooking in the kitchen. Kellan told Brock how most of her life. Brock realized that Kellan is more like Brock himself (other than the fact that Brock is a ladies man). Brock didn't act like he usually does in front of other women. In fact, Brock simply enjoyed the chat. "So, Brock, how's your life like?" Kellan finally asked. Brock started with how he left his father with the kids and how he accompanied Ash and Misty on their Pokemon journey. Kellan seemed interested, Brock can tell. By the time he finished telling her the entire story and how he got to her house, the dinner was finished cooking. "Ash! Misty! Pikachu! Togepi! Dinner's served!" Kellan yelled. Brock was about to do the same.

”Mmmmm… Food…”

Ash, Misty, Pikachu, and Togepi came charging in. Ash and Misty both avoided each other as they came through the door. 'Looks like they didn't settle anything,' Brock thought. "Those two, are they boyfriend and...?" Kellan asked Brock. Brock

“Thought… which caused smoke to come out of his ears… he didn’t do much of it…”

knew what Kellan was about to say but answered with a shrug. "They really act like a married couple," Brock whispered. Kellan giggled and sat down at the table. She noticed Pikachu was looking around the table. "Pika Pika? (Where's the ketchup?)" the mouse asked. Ash slides him a bottle to shut him up. "What's with your obsession with ketchup?" Ash asked. He didn't get any answer from the creature. Meanwhile, Team Rocket was staring at them through the window.

”Who would want to look at those four… just thinking about looking at them makes me want to barf”

"Oh! That food simply makes me starve!" James said.

"You said it! I want that glass of milk!" Meowth commented while staring at the glass of milk Misty is gulping down her throat.

"Shut up you two! We're here for that Pikachu!" Jessie said as she took out a mallet similar to Misty's and wacked both of them across the head.

"But Jessie! Just smell that food..." James complained.

"Yeah, there's nothing like that smell..." Meowth added.

Jessie wacked both of them again.

"Screw Pikachu!

(Pretending to be James) “Literally”

I want the FOOD!" James yelled.

"I want the milk!" Meowth yelled also.

Jessie is really furious this time. She takes one large swing at James and Meowth causing their medical bills to rise by the millions.

"Can't you two idiots think of anything but food? Once we capture Pikachu and get all that money, we can eat all the food we want!"

"But... but... I'm starved!" both James and Meowth cried.

"You miserable morons! You won't see food again until you CAPTURE THAT PIKACHU!!!"

James stares

“At Jessie’s boobs for about five minutes before she smacks him”

through the window again. "Well, I see food but we didn't capture Pikachu, yet."

Jessie drops in anime style. "That's not what I meant!"



Inside, Ash and the rest of his friends are eating dinner. Ash heard some complaining. "Hey guys, do you hear something?" he asked. Everybody stopped talking and heard Jessie and James complaining. Meowth has passed out on the ground. Misty pulls open the window, "GET OUT OF HERE, TEAM ROCKET!"

(Pretending to be Misty) “go away ya pesky dogs”

James kneels on the ground. Misty glares at him. He had the biggest soggy eyes Misty had ever seen. "Please, get me some FOOD!" he begged. Jessie kicked him. Misty turns to Pikachu, "You're on, Pika pal." James thought Pikachu was going to give him food. Instead, he and Team Rocket received 10,000 volts of electricity. "Team Rocket's blasting off again!" they yelled.

“I’m sorry but by now Team Rocket should be dead… I mean think about all the times they’ve been shocked…”

Pikachu resumed his meal and everybody followed. They were enjoying it for the most part until Team Rocket started whining. "Ash! If it weren't for you, we would have had an excellent meal!" Misty scolded with rage.

"Me? Team Rocket was here all along! I'm smart enough to know they're there. You're not!"

"I'm not smart? You got us lost on the way back to Viridian City!"

"I lost us? You said to take that short cut!"

"Short cut my ass. You didn't follow my directions!"

"Why should I follow your directions!? Oh, if you say, 'Go that way,' I go that way. If you say, 'Die,' I will kill myself. Is that correct?"

"That's perfectly correct! Why don't you just die right now?"

"Because if I were to be dead, you wouldn't be here enjoying this meal!"

"I would enjoy anything if you were to be dead!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

The arguing goes on and Kellan looks at Brock. "Is this what you go through everyday?" she asks. Brock nodded his head. "It's a pain in the butt," he commented. He looked at Ash and Misty who were still arguing. "Watch this," Brock says to Kellan with a grin. "Hey Ash, why don't you and Misty go into the guest room and make out?" Ash and Misty froze.

“ok” they yelled as they ran up stairs”

"Make out with him/her?" they both said pointing at each other. "You wish!" Their faces were both red and blushing.

"See, Kellan? They both love each other," Brock said.

"DO NOT!" the pair yelled back.

Kellan giggled. "Why don't both of you settle things down in the guest room? Only both of you. Maybe you'll explore some new areas, too!" she joked.

"WHAT?" they both yelled.

"Guest room is on the second floor. Go up the stairs, make a right, go straight and there it is. There's only one bed though!"

"I'm not sleeping on the floor!" they both yelled.

"You don't have to. It's a king sized bed."

"I'm not sleeping with him/her!" they both added.

"Too bad."

"Kellan," started Brock, "notice how much alike they are?"

"Are not!" the two teens yelled back.

"See? They even say the same things at the same time!"

"Do not!" they both yelled. Suddenly and finally, they realized they kept saying the same things. "Shut up, Ash/Misty, don't say what I say!"

"Enough's enough!" Brock said after getting annoyed. "Go to the guest room and settle things down. Pikachu, follow them just in case they start another fight. You'll know what to do. Togepi, follow too to make sure your mom doesn't get hurt."


Ash and Misty

“Ran up stairs holding hands and jumped on the bed and started making out”

both stomped up the stairs and into the guest room. Kellan was right. There was only one king sized bed. The two squeezed each other when trying to go through the doorway. Togepi looks at Pikachu who shrugs. The two teens were arguing who sleeps in the bed and who sleeps on the floor. Obviously, they both gave different answers. "Ash! You sleep on the floor. I need to remain beautiful!" Misty demanded.

"You? Beautiful? HAHAHA!" Ash laughed.

"Pikachu!" Pikachu shocked both of them. Ash and Misty fell to the floor fainting. Unfortunately, the floor beneath them was very weak and they fell through. Ash fell first followed by Misty. Ash landed on the couch on the first floor. When Misty landed on Ash, the floor broke and they went tumbling down into the basement. This time, Ash fell with his back onto the ground. Misty fell facing down on Ash, and the couch fell on top of them both making them unable to get out. Brock and Kellan immediately ran down to the basement to see what the cause of the noise was. Seeing this simply made them both laugh. Ash and Misty didn't seem to find it funny.

"Guys! Shut up!" Misty yelled.

"Yeah, get me out of here but leave her!"

"Leave me? You don't know how bad it is to have something on top of you."

"Yes I do. I fact, you're on top of me as well as the couch!"

"Even so, you can't get off if I don't get off."

"Don't why don't you get off?"

(Pretending to be Misty) “I won’t get up until you admit that you want some from me”

"Because I can't get this God damn couch off me! It's so heavy!"

"Heavy? I wouldn't be complaining! I have you on top of me was well!"

"Well, I only weigh 100 pounds! That's not like the couch which weighs around 200!"

"Good heavens! You're crushing me!"

"Well, I don't feel very well with my chest against your BONEY chest."

"My chest isn't boney! I'm just keeping my air in! That's why it feels boney!"

"So? My back almost broke because of this couch the fell on top of me!"

"What? You knee landed on my groin! You don't think that hurts!?"

"Who cares about your groin! You'll never have children when you grow up because nobody will marry you so it doesn't matter!"

"I will TOO get married! A scrawny little brat like you would never!"

"I'm not scrawny! You're scrawny. When I get out of here, I'll knee you in the groin more!"

"You do and die! Why, I'll force you to die!"

"Who cares? Brock, Kellan, GET US OUTTA HERE!"

Brock and Kellan looked at each other.

“And decided to go up stairs and make love for 13 hours strait before letting them out”

"Should we? It's kinda interesting?" Kellan asked.

"Nah, they're cuter this way," Brock laughed. Pikachu and Togepi jumped from the 2nd floor.

"Pika-Pikachu (Yeah, leave them this way!)" Pikachu suggested.

"Briii! (Yeah, leave Mommy with Daddy!)" the egg thing added.

"Daddy?" Ash yelled out.

"Togepi, I may be your mother but that doesn't mean Ash is your father!"

"I would never marry you Misty!"

"Ha! You think I'll even want to marry you? Give me break!"

"Hmph. You don't even have a boyfriend. Don't tell me you're l..."

Misty waited for Ash to finish. She managed to move her knee near Ash's groin. Ash could feel it and knew that finishing this statement would result in tremendous pain.

(Pretending to be Ash) “Lesbian”

"...lonely type," Ash managed to conclude and finish. Misty moved away her knee.

"I am NOT lonely! In fact, I have Brock, Pikachu, Togepi, and even my new friend, Kellan!"

"So? They're my friends as well!"

"They're your friends because they pity you!"

"Pity? They're pitying you, I believe."

"Damn you, child!" Misty knees Ash in the groin.

"OW! You always get violent when you lose a fight!"

"What!? I never lost a fight with you!"

"Oh? What about at Cerulean Gym?"

"That was a draw!"

"Was not! I got the badge meaning I won!"

"What? All the badges you have ever got depended on how stupid you made yourself look. The gym leaders felt sorry for you and gave them to you!"

"Not true!"

"Is too!"

"What about Vermillion City?"

"You couldn't have won if Brock didn't help you!"

"So? I didn't get the badge because somebody felt sorry for me!"

Misty knees Ash again.

“I feel so sorry for Ash… no I don’t never mind…”

"YEOUCH! Quit it!"

Misty goes for it again and again.

“That had to hurt”

"Misty! Quit it! You whore!"

"Never call me a whore again!"

"OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!"

Pikachu, Togepi, Brock, and Kellan all closed their eyes as if it were the most painful situation ever presented in history as Ash nearly passed out.



The next morning, the couch was still on Misty and Ash. Ash wanted to cry from the pain and Misty wanted to

“Just do IT (Just like nike says)”

get off Ash. Brock and Kellan had tried to move away the 200 pound couch but they were far too weak. "You guys will have to stay like this," they remembered Brock saying. The two had stopped arguing when Ash almost passed out because of pain. Misty managed to sleep and leaned on Ash's shoulder. Ash tried to sleep but the pressure of the couch and the pain from Misty kept him awake. 'Why does my life have to be so horrible?' Ash thought. Pikachu and Togepi had slept on the couch adding more pressure for Ash and Misty. However, they found things interesting from the two.

Misty woke up forgetting the fact that she was on Ash and the couch was on her. She tried pushing herself up but suddenly realized what happened last night. "Stop fidgeting, Misty..." Ash coughed out. Misty was speechless. She knew how much pain Ash was in, especially from last night.

"Ash?" she asked.

"What?"

(Pretending to me Misty) “I was going to tell you how sorry I was but I changed my mind… (Back to not pretending to be anyone) she answered as she kneed him again”

"Sorry about last night."

"It hurt...," Ash said in a painful voice.

"I didn't mean to knee you that hard."

"Well, you did."

"Hopefully, you can have children."

"Why do you care?"

(Pretending to be Misty) “Because I want to have you’re kids”

Misty was silent. She didn't know why she asked. At least, she made herself think she didn't know why. "Well... er......" was all that came out of the girl. After waiting a couple of minutes, Misty started asking Ash questions again.

"Is your groin okay?"

"To tell you the truth, it's numb now."

Misty started laughing. Ash didn't think it was funny. Suddenly, Ash had an idea.

"Misty?"

"Pull that mallet out."

"Why?"

(Pretending to be Ash) “In the words of Nike…”

"Just do it."

Misty pulls out the mallet.

"Now smash the area around my head with it."

"What!? WHY?"

"Look, I may pass out and die. You've always wanted me to die. I you hit me hard enough; the area around my head will collapse into a hole giving you enough room to get out. Who cares if I die?"

"Brock and everybody else will..."

"No they won't," Ash said as a tear came out of his eye. "I'm no Pokemon master. You're right. I can't win any badges without pity or help from somebody. Just kill me and get out..."

(Pretending to be Misty) “Ok!”

Misty was silent. She never thought Ash would decide to let himself die. She was shocked. Plus, she also loved Ash. If he died, Misty will be lonely. "No...," Misty answered.

"Why?"

Misty was speechless again. She couldn't just tell him that she loved him. She had to think of something else. "No... because... you still owe me a bike!" 'Yeah, that's it,' Misty thought.

"After I die, just reach into my backpack, there's $500 there waiting for you."

Misty was caught in a dead end. She couldn't get another excuse. She shed a tear, pulled out her mallet, and raised it above her head as far as it could go. Before she swung it, Ash yelled, "Wait!"

"W... what?"

"I have to tell you something before I die."

"Y... yes?"

"Sorry on what I said I'd never marry you. I would."

(Pretending to be Misty… Again) “Really… too bad… It”s been nice knowing ya… bye”

Misty was silent.

"To tell you the truth, I love you...," Ash's voice was sobbing. Misty put back the mallet and whispered in Ash's ear, "I love you too." Ash closed his eyes forcing out his tears. Misty felt his tears brush across her face. She too shed tears. Misty chucked the mallet across the basement not wanting to use it. "Why'd you do that?" Ash asked.

"Why'd you think I want to if I love you?" Misty replied.

Ash shrugged. He lifted his head so his lips came in contact with Misty's. As lean lowered his head, Misty's head lowered as well. Brock and Kellan came in just in time to see to two teens kissing. "What did I tell you? They're in love," Brock said. Ash and Misty stopped. This time, they didn't comment on it. Meanwhile, Pikachu and Togepi, who were both on the couch, passed the popcorn watchin the show. "Kellan, did you guys figure out a way to get out?" Ash asked.

(Pretending to be Kellan) “Nope look’s like you’ll have to stay there for ever”

Ash reached for one of the pokeballs in his belt. Misty's leg was in the way so he was having trouble trying to get it. Misty felt a blush go up as Ash moved his hand pass her leg. Ash was touching her! Suddenly, she realized that the Pokeball Ash was reaching for pass her leg. She struggled around so Ash can get it. "Bulbasaur, I choose you!" he said as he threw the Pokeball. "Use your whips to pull this couch away!" The Bulbasaur did as its master told it to do. Apparently, the couch didn't even slide. Ash reached for another one of his Pokeballs. "Squirtle! Go! Hydro pump this couch out of the way." No luck. He called for Pidgeotto to "whirlwind" the couch away. The couch went flying through the room. "Good idea, Kellan. I guess using Pokemon could really become useful," Ash commented.

When the two got off each other, Brock was laughing. "What an unusual way to start love," he laughed. Brock was right, it was unusual. A couch was on top of them when they started it. Kellan, Pikachu, and Togepi got the joke and joined Brock in laughing. Ash and Misty didn't think it was very funny. "Come on, you two, laugh!" Brock said. Ash and Misty each gave a weak smile

“And started to beat up Brock and Kellan for laughing at them”

that later developed into laughter.

Misty stretched her back as she got out of the basement. "What are you going to do about the floors?" Ash asked.

"Don't worry," Kellan said, "Machop and Machoke will repair things."

“If she had a Machop and a Machoke then why didn’t she use them to get the couch off of them earlier?”

Out came the two Pokemon from the stairs holding hammers, a jar full of nails, and some boards. They repaired the floor faster than a blink of an eye. "Sorry for breaking the floors," Misty apologized.

"No need for worry. I broke through a couple of times myself." There was silence. Suddenly, Brock's stomach growled. "I'm starving," he muttered. "I'm cooking breakfast." Kellan followed Brock to the kitchen. Pikachu and Togepi were chattering away again. This leaves Ash and Misty. They looked at each other in the living room. "Oh, well," Ash concluded as they headed upstairs to the guest room.

“To do you know what…”

(Mister’s notes: So how did I do? I know it’s a little vulgar… that’s why I rated it R instead of PG-13 or something… send comments to tkismine@hotmail.com)